I love My Mess

2011-06-24T05:49:00.000-05:00

I am so proud of this YOUNG MAN

Don't Worry Be Happy

2011-03-04T07:45:00.000-06:00

Remember that popular song of the *80's* or was it the *90's*.

It truly easier said than done. It seems that man entire built in nature is to worry, doubt, be overly concerned, and have less positive expectation about his life, his surroundings, and his future.

I hope you don't think I have anything to offer to the solution other than the standard response. However the standard response should be enough. I go back to the faithful sayings of the women who raised me. These women obviously borrowed from the Word of God to repeat sound advice and they smiled a lot and that made it all feel all right.

You know some of those phrases too.

"He may not come when you want Him but He is always right on time."

"He is able"

"Don't sweat the small stuff...It is all small stuff"

"We walk by faith and not by sight"

"Just have faith in God and so on and so on"

Maybe that is enough....

I know if I feed myself positives and expect the good my bad seems a little less dreadful!

Be thankful for the good things

Don't

Worry

Happy!!!!!

Believe in Yourself

2011-03-02T06:17:00.000-06:00

If you don't believe in yourself anyone else would be somewhat foolish to continue to believe in you.

Know that you are incredibly and wonderfully made with Love.

Know that you have a purpose, even if you haven't discovered it yet.

Know [and embrace the fact] that you are loved.
===Even Hitler had those who truly loved him so I know someone truly loves you.

Know that if you don't like who you are now YOU CAN CHANGE!!!

If you don't believe in yourself anyone else would be somewhat foolish to continue to believe in you.

sTAy bLESSEd

CLarence D..

Start Again

2011-02-27T23:30:00.000-06:00

Have you ever started a journey and not been able to reach the destination? It is okay! Life is about the the Start Over. If you are blessed to wake up in the morning. Start Over, Refocus on the dream or desire and get back to work on it. Don't let anyone keep you from it, EspeciaLLy yourself!!

It has been over a year since i last wrote in this blog. I forgive me for losing my focus and I plan and promise to do better than i hAVE IN THE PAST!!

Dust off your dreams and Start OVER.........

Excuses, Excuses, Excuses.........

2010-01-29T15:21:00.001-06:00

Hello, ILOVEMYMESS Readers,

The New Year has begun and is flying by in a Flash unless you are 6 years old where time appears to be standing still. By this time of the year many have already started to lose their RESOLVE for some of their New Years Resolutions. By March most people will have given up altogether. Maybe my independent opinion, personal study of this behavior pattern is incorrect. However why don't you do a poll in your circle of physical or social network friends to see if this is anywhere close to being true.

It is not that people don't love the idea of CHANGING FOR THEIR OWN GOOD. It is however in their best short term interest easier to submit to old Habits if they haven't giving themselves a compelling reason to CHANGE!!

There are many reasons that can be given for not accomplishing a Goal. The Problem is any reason, or should I say (EXCUSE) will do.

The Dictionary defines excuse as an apology in an attempt to remove blame from, then another definition refers to the active forgiveness of someone who has done something in which normally They would be taking the blame or responsibility for something they should have or should not have done. It seems to me that progressively the definition expands to an all out release, forgiveness, and pardon for a behavior or action. Some of the relevant synonyms uses are Self-Justification, Alibi, Condone, Pardon, and Forgive.

Believe me when I say there will always be an excuse available for anything You Don't Get Done!!

The easier it becomes for you to find one on a regular basis should alert you to the fact that you have not made a true invested commitment. If you desire Change you can believe in for YOURSELF!! Stop Making Excuses!!

You Might Just Need More Training or Help to Do What You Say You Want to DO!! Ask For The Help!!

Until Next Time....

Be Sure To Add Me as a Friend on your Facebook.com/ilovemymess, Twitter.com/ilovemymess

Clarence is a Mess

What will you do with your MESS

2010-01-14T14:55:00.000-06:00

Hello ILOVEMYMESS readers,

I am honored and bless you took the time to come by and check me out. it is my Goal to give you something of value for coming here to check out what I have to say! In 2010 I want to be known for having added meaningful value to the life of 100 close and personal family, close by friends, and internet buddies. This is one of my attempts at that effort.

I hope you try to do the same. The other day I was thinking to myself...

Self You Are A Mess...What does ILOVEMYMESS really mean, what is it trying to accomplish.

The concept is simple in my head but I don't know if I adequately translate what is in my head, and on my heart to an internet reader.

Well Here Goes...

Your Life is a Mess, but it is Your Mess!! Love your mess, take ownership of it, take responsibility for it, Change it if you will but don't blame others You Are A Free Will Individual With The POWER Of Choice!

So look deep in the mirror, at your body features, in your minds eye, at the environment you have chosen, at your job, at your money, at the special people in your life, at your challenges. It is yours! If you look and you don't like what you see.....I GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO CHANGE IT!!

YOU HAD THE POWER ALL ALONG!!

Hope to see you Soon
Seadog

2010-01-04T06:57:00.000-06:00

Happy New Year ILOVEMYMESS Readers,

   This is a stressful time of the year!! Historically

Christmas and the New Year is personally the

hardest part of the year. I feel more depressed

during this time of year than any other. I believe

in God and Jesus Christ his Son so there is

absolutely no chance of me committing suicide due to

my sadness or stress. No worries, comments,

concerns need be expressed on my behalf as a result

of this blog. That being said the statistics are

clear that December and January in America are

Historically the greateast month for suicides.

This is a very sobering and disheartening fact of

the holiday season. Christmas is supposed to be

about the gift of God's Son to man. I am trying not

to put on my preacher hat, But I can't help but to

express that God's Gift was Graceous,Compassionate,

Thoughtful, Helpful, Merciful, Compelling and

Caring. Obviously there are many more adverbs that

could be used but at least you may get a picture of

my point.

   As we consider the act of giving I feel the need to

share two thoughts on giving for the new year.

(this may be long I hope you stay with me all the

way through)

Thought 1..
My wife is an outstanding cook!! I consider it a

privilege to sit in front of a meal she has

prepared!! It is a great gift she has that she

shares with me almost daily. Sometime 2 or 3 times

a day. there may be some men who declare that is

their wife's job to cook and clean. I do not hold

her accountable to cook for me as an oblagation.

My mom and dad taught me showed me how to cook for

myself and I have no problem feeding myself when I

am hungry. As a matter of fact, I do not want her

to cook for me if she is angry. The point I want

to emphasize is my personal preference is that if

you give me a gift it should be given freely and

cheerfully. Giving Grudgingly is not noteworthy,

pleasing, acceptable, or in many ways neither is it

beneficial to the one who claims to give it.

Love should always be unconditional but your gift

is not. It must be limited to the resources you

control and are willing to release.

Thought 2..
Just recently a news report about 2 certified EMT's

surfaced on the wire. The way I understood it was

they were on a break from their Job when a pregnant

women began having complications in the vicinity of

where they were taking their break and requested

their help and they refused her.

Now obviously I wasn't there and I have trouble

trusting most media reports due to their necessary

limitations. However I became somewhat furious upon

hearing the allegations. This woman who was known

to the EMT's, was reported to have served them on

several occasions earlier. This women in her time

of need was refused service. This women was told

she needed to call 911 for more EMT's to come who

were not on break. This women and her child died!

There are no guarantees this woman and child would

have survived even if the initial EMT's had helped

her. Life is a gift and their is no guarantee of

your next year, next week, next day, or next

breath.

My point then is there are times when due to your

training, proximity, and need of the moment when

you should feel the obligation to render service.

Everyman will have to answer that for themselves

just as these EMT's did but the Golden Rule is a

very Good measuring stick!! Maybe it should be

called the Golden Ruler!!

   In 2010 make a decision to Love as hard and as much

as you can or as much as the recipient will allow

themselves to receive!!

Stay Blessed...

Black Male Mentors Needed Now --- Preferably Black Males--

2009-12-14T18:28:00.013-06:00

Hello ILOVEMYMESS readers,

Happy Birthday shout out to my youngest son TJ

Doggan. He is 17 years young today!! I am his

proud papa.

The topic for Today is mentoring! Mentoring is

important for all people. It is especially

important in these days and times for the Young

Black Male in the United States. I do not have to

paint a picture of the plight of this particular

group of males but don't believe ONLY what you see

on TV, Cable, and the News Media as to who and what

they are capable of becoming.

The word Mentor itself probably comes from the

Greek Tales of Homer where an old man

(Mentes) guides a young man (Telemachus) to manhood.

What is fascinating about the story is the goddess

Athena actually takes on the body of Mentor. In an

unrelated way this is how most black males have

been primarily mentored. Thank God for

compassionate, caring, and supportive female

figures.

Mentoring, from the Greek word means enduring. It is

defined as a sustained relationship between a youth

and an adult. Through continued involvement, the

adult offers support, guidance, and assistance as

the younger person goes through a difficult period,

faces new challenges, or works to correct earlier

problems.

The mentor to mentee relationship varies and is not

necessarily bound to age. The reasoning of

mentoring is to help that other person to do a job

more effectively and/or to progress in their

career, and hopefully live a life more abundantly

more easily overcoming their obstacles, and

circumstances. The good mentor is probably someone

who has "been there, done that" before. And an

effective mentor might use a variety of approaches,

coaching, training, discussion, counseling, hand in

hand and one on one caring leadership, etc.

I would like to say I am passionate about this

subject. I have been mentored intentionally and

unintentionally throughout the course of my life. I

also have a legitimate body of work on this subject

since I have worked as a Youth Counselor, Youth

Minister, and functioned in many communities as an

Activist and Advocate worker.

I appreciate those who have put the time in to

ensure my life would be fulfilling. Kudos to the

many MOMS, DADS, TEACHERS, YOUTH WORKERS, YOUTH

MINISTERS, SCOUT LEADERS, SCHOLARSHIP FUNDERS,

GRANNY'S, GRANDDADS, UNCLES, AUNTS, BROTHERS,

SISTERS, FRIENDS,NEIGHBORS, COACHES, BOSSES,

SUPERVISORS, MANAGERS, POLICEMAN, CIVIL

SERVANTS,SOCIAL WORKERS, DEACONS, ELDERS, LEADING

BRETHREN, SENIOR MINISTERS AND VISITING EVANGELIST,

who served my needs and are currently serving the

world even as we write. Forgive me for the Titles I missed!!

If you are a Mentor, evaluate your effectiveness

and increase your enthusiasm. If you are the

Mentee respect and honor the time and effort people

are giving to you. You may not always like the

method but be sure to get the point!

My Prayer and Plea IS 4 MORE BLACK MEN TO GET INVOLVED!!

Tiger Woods Mess

2009-12-08T16:09:00.000-06:00

Hello ILOVEMYMESS Readers,

Okay, I tried to avoid this issue for as long as I could for all of the obvious reasons. First reason, I really don't care about the personal life of public officials or popular personalities. Second reason, He who is without sin cast the first stone. All have fallen short of the proverbial moral standard. Third reason, My Mom's and Granny's advice about public communication has always been real valuable "If you can't say anything good about a person or situation it is best not to publicly speak on it at all."

Well, I won't go into the obvious joke box. You can google for Tiger Woods Jokes or turn on your TV and Radio for the best of the best of Tiger Woods Fiasco. You will find more stuff than you probably should laugh about. I am sure Tiger has found for him and his wife and kids now that this is public it is definitely not a laughing matter. Maybe, he will be able to laugh at himself some years down the line. We all should be able to laugh at our mistakes eventually. Somewhere down the line it will be helpful to his mental health to laugh...Somewhere down the line.

I am a man who believes very much in the institution of marriage I consider marital fidelity a very big component in fulfilling the values of that institution. My Granny "D" had several phrases she used to use concerning the issue. She used to say "You can be sure your sins will find you out." She would remark "Anything done in the dark will come to the light." Comically she even retorted to me "Clarence, You know you can't dance so what makes you think you can hide skeletons in your closet!" I am sure George Bernard Shaw himself would have to laugh at that one.

I love my mess concept essentially came out of the fact that my wife would frequently tell me that I was a mess. I would then reply to her you are a mess!! Then, on quick forgiving occasions we would look each other in the eye, smile at each other and say in unison "I love My Mess". Only time will tell what will become of Tiger and his wife but let me bring back to your memory the words of a famous commercial ad anyone who follows Tiger even casually should remember. " I Am Tiger Woods!".

Now, that phrase takes on an altogether new meaning, It would behove all of us to think of the potential consequences of our decisions thoroughly!

Who will You have to Answer to Now and in the Future for your Actions?

The President Speaks

2009-12-02T14:53:00.001-06:00

Ilovemymess Reader's,

Yes, I Voted for OBAMA. I think he is trying to make the best out of a difficult situation. I sometimes get so upset with all the difficulty that is placed in his way. I know it is bad enough already. High unemployment, bad economy, health care situation in America, a war presence in two major countries. I hope he stays encouraged in all that he has on his plate to accomplish.

I admittedly don't agree with adding more troops to Afghanistan but I am thankful that this is not my call and that I don't have to try to decipher all the information that has been prepared to help him render his decision. He clearly makes his argument for why he believes this is the way we must go and as Commander in Chief it is his call.

I think it is courageous of him to try to change the United States and the world for the positive, knowing he won't be able to please all people. I am equally dishearten by the fact that so many would see him fail in his endeavors to attain the goal.

Life is hard for all people. I appreciate that he works to fix this fact tirelessly for the masses. Many people have limited understanding of how they can control their circumstances. My view of President Obama is limited but it appears to me he is seeking to understand the needs of all.

Be encouraged Mr.President. You got the Job you applied for it. Get it Done!!

Clarence D. AKA SeaDog

Be My Friend

2009-12-01T18:02:00.004-06:00

to hit that number by this 12/

ILoveMyMess Reader's,

Welcome to my new blog. No more procrastination.

My name is Clarence Doggan. I am writing this

because the time has come for me to get on my

mission.

I have been trained from a young child to be kind,

and to encourage others. As I look into the world

today this is needed just as much now as in the

beginning of the world. I am uniquely qualified to

give this message because I have benefitted from

the encouragement of some of God's Best and

Brightest Creations.

\\\My Background...

Christian....I am a minister of God and a faithful

minister of the church of Christ....

although I don't especially believe I will be using

this venue to preach book chapter and verse to you

I do believe knowing this will help you to

understand why I think like I think.

American Black Man....I can't help it. It has been

engraven upon my psyche that this is significant.

Maybe it's is the trials and or stygma that America

has given such a priority to this part of who I am

but it makes me see the world from a very different

perspective. Some may applaud this vision, some

may see it as very flawed but I know my thoughts,

ideas dreams are greatly enhanced and limited

because of this perspective. I hope this will be as

interesting to you to follow as it is to me to

engage.

Conservatively Common...I am quickly approaching my

20 wedding anniversary. I have a strong black

beautiful queen who has given me two almost grown

young men for children. ( they will tell you they

are grown ) I volunteer in my community above and

beyound my church work. I dream of making the world

a better place and limited Goverment interference.

That being said I am still a Democrat in my

political heart and wish my Republican friends

would live by the statement "Compassionate

Conservatism".

Comically characteristic...If you choose to get to

know me you will find I am a little crazy. My wife

tells me all the time "You are a mess". Hope you

enjoy my brand of humor so you can say ILOVEMYMESS.

If you choose to Journey with me I will try to

spontaneously and creatively encourage you to look

at the mess we live in and find enjoyment,

encouragement, and enthusiasm to fulfill your

purpose in this life.

I hope you will share this experience with me.

Clarence D. AKA SeaDog

You may also follow me on....

Facebook.com/ilovemymess

Facebook says I can be personal

with up to 5000 friends..

My Goal is to achieve this by

DEC 2010..